“Put more clothes on” she said.

Because yogis who show their bodies treat yoga like a fashion show, and men can’t control themselves and probably pleasure themselves to my image. That’s what she said.

I replied: 

As someone who was once in rehab for anorexia, I think it’s rather amazing how far I’ve come.

I love my body and hope to display that, because I believe people (primarily women) are constantly shamed for exploring, enjoying, and yes showing their body particularly women who are not stick thin.

I am well aware that I am a strong and curvy woman, and I hope to normalize that in a culture that prospers and proliferates off of us feeling like we need to be thinner.

***

I think the issue isn’t what people are wearing as much as the shame that we associate with it.

The judgment. The ridicule.

If what you wear makes you feel good… then wear whatever you want.

I associate baggy clothes with anorexia, and times of my life when I have been depressed, reclusive, and sad. Hiding out. I think this issue isn’t the clothing. It’s the stigma that perhaps people have labeled them with.

This type of thinking is the stuff that blames women when they are sexually assaulted. “She was wearing skanky clothing, she was asking for it”.

Fuck to the NO.

It’s an intention issue.

I think this person, not knowing my truth assumed that I show my body because I want attention. When really that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

I show my body because my body is not the norm.  

Fit with a side of curve is not exactly covering magazines. But it should be. Health should be. Vitality should be. Intelligence should be. 

I know what she’s talking about.

There are people out there posting basic shit on social media with no substance, and the intention is validation.

“Please accept me” the intention is “tell me I’m attractive and maybe one day I’ll believe it”.

Nope.

I feel sexy when I move this way. I feel good when I wear little things.

It’s about the feeling it evokes in me, and hopefully in you.

It’s important to feel sexy in your own skin and express that in a healthy way.

It’s important to show up as ourselves and when people throw shade to not shrink, not puff up, but stand our sacred ground.

It’s important to show up as ourselves because what other people think of us, is none of our business.

None of our business at all.

Alexa Silvaggio is a wellness entrepreneur based in New York City, and Los Angeles.  She is a yoga instructor, writer, speaker, podcast host, social media influencer, retreat leader, life coach, mover, and shaker. She would love to connect with you! @alexasilvaggio or www.alexasilvaggio.com

Image courtesy of Andrew Rice.