“I’m so tired and frustrated with waiting, wishing, hoping, and yearning for my soulmate to arrive.”

This is one of the most common complaints I hear from single men and women. They want to know if I can share with them the secret to speeding up the process.

While I do know and believe that we can consciously manifest the love of our life (I’ve done it as have thousands of my students around the world) we don’t get to choose the speed at which it all comes together.

“Savoring the waiting,” I believe, is an important part of the process. This is where we get to really enjoy our last days of being single, a time where we can relish the journey and joyfully anticipate our soulmate’s arrival.

You can choose to allow yourself to feel desperate and alone, or you can choose to feel happy and blessed. One way to adopt the “happy and blessed” mindset is to understand the ancient Japanese aesthetic known as wabi sabi which honors all things old, worn, weathered, imperfect, and impermanent. In fact, it seeks to find “beauty and perfection in the imperfections.”

You can now choose to adopt a wabi sabi perspective to your final days as a “single” rather than choosing to succumb to weeks or months of simply “enduring” the wait.

Think of it this way: when the seeds of a flower have been planted in the ground and the first leaves begin to sprout, the gardener does not tug on the leaves every day to make the plant grow fast. He trusts that Mother Nature will play her role, and then when the time is right the flower will blossom. Like a gardener, you have planted a seed and invited love to unfold in your life.

Another benefit to practicing wabi sabi is that it will become infinitely beneficial once you are with your beloved. I call this the practice of Wabi Sabi Love.

Why would you take the time to learn how to apply Wabi Sabi Love to your relationship? Because 50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second marriages and 74% of third marriages all end in divorce! We aren’t born with the innate knowledge of how to “do” relationship. Even worse, we’ve been brainwashed by modern day society to look for and seek perfection, which leads to an ongoing state of frustration and dissatisfaction.

In truth, we all know that perfection is not possible. But with Wabi Sabi Love we can come to appreciate our own and the other’s imperfection, and can actually experience a more natural state of grace than we thought possible.

By learning and practicing Wabi Sabi Love you begin to accept the flaws, imperfections, and limitations—as well as the gifts and blessings—that form your shared history as a couple. Acceptance and its counterpart, understanding, are crucial to achieving relationship harmony. It is sacred love, the highest form of love, and like most things worth striving for, it requires patience, commitment, personal responsibility, and practice. Imagine how great you will feel when you know your partner loves all of you, all the time? The good, the bad, and everything in between!

My soulmate of fourteen years, Brian, and I credit the success of our relationship to applying Wabi Sabi Love to everyday life.

If you are ready for more love, fun, harmony, and passion in your relationship, I encourage you to download the first chapter of Wabi Sabi Love for free at www.wabisabilove.com


Arielle Ford is a gifted writer and the author of eight books including her latest Wabi Sabi Love: The Ancient Art of Finding Perfect Love in Imperfect Relationships and the international bestseller, THE SOULMATE SECRET: Manifest The Love of Your Life With The Law of Attraction. She lives in La Jolla, CA with her husband/soulmate, Brian Hilliard and their feline friends.

For more on Arielle please visit www.soulmatesecret.com.

* Photo by KIUKO