Sometimes love comes when you least expect it but not a moment before you have taken that much needed time to heal from old wounds and examine some of the patterns that you have transferred from one relationship to the next. It took an emotionally abusive relationship to bring to light a very difficult truth, and it hit me like a ton of bricks; I kept attracting into my life men that were not ready for an intimate partnership. The reason for this, quickly came to realize is that I never did really take the time to get to know myself, cultivate a loving relationship with myself, and most importantly, a part of me did not deem myself worthy of love.

This is where I really looked at myself in the mirror, and went inside because there I would find all of the answers that I was seeking. Sadly to admit that this revelation would come late into my thirties, better late than sorry is what they say! I began the healing work, visited my childhood traumas, forgave what was needed to be forgiven and while the work still continues…I have however found a deeper meaning for my life, use my story to help other women in their own journey of self-discovery. I have written a book, facilitated journaling workshops, and have received countless invitations to speak at Women’s Empowerment Conferences. In 2019, I was honored the 100 Women Of Color Award for my work.

I took my pain, and continued to rewrite my story. The one great lesson that all my relationships have taught me is that, we have to first become that person in which we hope to find. I wanted to be accepted, valued, and honored. I first had to give myself all of those things. This journey has been inspired by my favorite Rumi quote:

“What you seek is seeking you” 

Are you still with me? I hope so because there is so much beauty in the way that this story is currently unfolding.

My wish in sharing my journey to finding true love is that it serves as a reminder that it is an inside job, first. @Luceinspiration (Click to Tweet!)

Here is it is, a love story, of how what is meant for you will always find its way to you.

I remember the feeling I felt when glancing at his photo on his social media feed, it was at that moment when my heart spoke “that is him”! But since I had never met this man that I had a great deal of admiration for, in person, I felt a great deal of hesitation and doubt. Because of my initial reluctance to accept my own feelings, I went on to live my life without embracing my emotions. Although we had developed a quaint online friendship, I would continue to adore him from a distance. He lived in Los Angeles and I in Washington D.C. at the time -what were the odds that our paths would ever cross? I often asked. I went on to focus on my inner-work and asked the universe to send me someone that is kind considerate and for my higher good.

Years would have passed, one blistering August day while now living in Rhode Island and after countless conversations and text messages from the man that I believed to be my spiritual partner (yes, him!). I received a private message from him while he did his youth-work in Tanzania (yes, all the way from Africa!). This was the universes’ answer I exclaimed; this was the man I had been preparing myself for. We decided that we would open ourselves to love again by embarking in a life-partnership together.

That following year, in August my love made a trip to Rhode Island, we packed our U-Haul trailer with all of my belongings. There we began our cross-country trip, first stop; Washington D.C., Kansas, Colorado, Utah, Nevada, and to our final destination: our new home in University Hills. I am enjoying writing these next chapters with my love by my side, creating each moment together. How do you wish to recreate your story?

Lucy Coutinho is an Author, Educator, and Host of Women’s Wellness with Luce Inspiration Podcast. She is the founder of Luce Inspiration, a positive media company using words and multimedia to empower and heal. You can find her book; Peaces Of Freedom (A Self-Healing Journal) on Amazon and Kindle. Join her mission on Instagram and Twitter.

Image courtesy of Nathan Dumlao.