When you hunt for things to acknowledge and celebrate in others, you will soon detect a greater level of appreciation for everything.
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”- Leo F. Buscaglia
One of my favorite things to do out in the world is to be what I call a “Compliment Columbo.”
What’s that? Columbo was a TV show I liked about a do-gooder detective named, you guessed it, Columbo who was always on the hunt for clues that led to the truth. My invitation to you is to become a detective who searches for opportunities to give unsuspecting people genuine and personalized compliments. In doing so, you contribute to UPlifting someone’s day by reminding them of the truth of who they are.
Why I love doing this is because most people walk around disconnected from others while listening to stress producing, limiting self-talk. Be on the lookout for these people. Here are some clues: they are looking down and avoid eye contact, they have their head buried in their phone, they have a furrowed brow, they are moving super fast (and they are not exercising), or they just look like they are having a bad day. When you deliver the compliment, add a bit of personal touch so the recipient really connects to what you are saying. For example, when I see a woman in a beautiful dress I say something like, “You look absolutely amazing in that dress” as opposed to, “That’s a great dress.”
It’s so fun to surprise someone by interrupting their negative self-talk with words of affirmation and acknowledgment! You realize the healing power of giving people genuine compliments as you see the smiles rush to their faces. And don’t limit your compliments to people who seem like they could use it. Whenever you see something that strikes you in a positive way instead of just thinking it, share it with the person!
Go out of your way to pay someone a compliment to experience the payoff of appreciation.
Also, being a compliment Columbo is one of the best ways I know to deal with comparison and jealousy. The instant we go into envy, we are in a state of depreciation. Paying someone a genuine compliment immediately shifts our energy toward one of appreciation. And the more we are in that energy, the more we recognize our unique own beauty, worth, and gifts. So the next time you find yourself comparing yourself to someone, compliment them instead because really:
It’s just criminal to believe anyone one is better or worse than you. @ChristinHassler (Click to Tweet!)
Another thing that tends to happen when you are on the hunt for compliments is that you may start to receive more of them. So when you do, I encourage you – in fact, I beg of you – receive them! No deflecting or denying! Smile, say “thank you,” and take it in. Please do not negate it in any way or immediately reciprocate. Give others the opportunity to play detective and deliver compliments that clue you into the truth of who you are.
Fondly,
Christine
P.S. I have a new podcast where I coach people LIVE on the air. Head over to Over it and On With It and listen in for inspiration and action steps.
Christine Hassler has broken down the complex and overwhelming experience of recovering from disappointment into a step-by-step treatment plan in her new book Expectation Hangover. This book reveals the formula for how to process disappointment on the emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual levels to immediately ease suffering. Instead of wallowing in regret, self-recrimination, or anger, we can see these experiences as catalysts for profound transformation and doorways that open to possibility. You can find more info on her website, and follow her on Twitter and FB.
Image courtesy of sharonang.