As I write this, my heart feels heavy and happy, sad and grateful.

My wife, Celeste and I recently made the decision to lay our loyal companion of fourteen years, Sasha the dog, to rest. It’s so hard to believe because not long ago she was golfing with me everyday, going for hikes and ripping it up in the forest like a young pup. That is until a bad case of Vestibular syndrome hit her hard.

On the days leading up to her journey over the rainbow bridge we spent many precious moments with our tears and each other. It was so bitter sweet knowing that we had seven final days with Sasha before we’d send her home.

The well of grief I’m still present to some days is incredible and so beautiful. I’m grateful to be able to feel this pain in my heart.

To me, it is a sign that my heart has swelled up with so much love that the only thing it could do is crack open and overflow with tears.

If it weren’t for my wife, Celeste, I don’t think I ever could’ve written what you are reading. So thank you darling for inspiring and teaching me so much about my own heart and emotions.

It wasn’t until Celeste’s father took his own life that I truly understood the full rainbow spectrum of emotions that are available and necessary for us to experience on our human journey.

For two years (and a bit) I supported Celeste through a journey of deep grieving. At times I wondered if she’d ever come through the other side. But the spark of light in her eyes assured me that she would – and she has, brighter, stronger and more beautiful than ever.

Being a man, I at first thought I could help fix her pain and sorrows; somehow make them right. But as time wore on and I watched her move through wave after wave of this grief tsunami, I began to understand that there was nothing wrong. In fact, it was so perfect and right.

The grief she was feeling was a celebration, just like the grief that has been spilling over from my heart has also been a celebration for how much I have loved this beautiful being who brought so much joy to our lives.

Witnessing Celeste embrace her own sadness, depression, tears, forgiveness and pain gave me permission to explore my own. In the last few years I too have rode many of my own emotional roller coasters, but I don’t think any have been as big as the ones I experienced recently.

I just want to say that growing up in a culture where it’s wrong for men to cry or to show any emotion other than anger, rage or happiness makes it challenging for us to be authentic.

When we go to a funeral we look around and see men wearing black sunglasses because they’re afraid to show the pain they feel. It’s viewed as weak. It was honestly so hard getting over that stigma, but it’s also been the most liberating thing I’ve ever allowed myself to do.

I question, how can it be weak for a man to love, to care and to feel? Why is it that we praise men who do not show emotion? If we lived in a world where men were encouraged to feel their sorrows and share their emotions openly, I do believe we’d have less war, hatred and violence. I also believe we’d have more openness, authentic connection and kindness amongst our people.

But instead we shut down our heart and numb our feelings with drugs, alcohol or entertainment. We feel ashamed and wonder why we’re not stronger or we push it down and let it rot in our guts until it becomes bitterness or cancer.

This idea that is so deeply ingrained in us is so ass-backwards. A man (or woman) who does not truly feel all of his or her emotions shuts their heart down, becomes bitter, rigid, angry and numb. This is not noble or honourable. It is cowardly.

For so many years I wore a mask that I didn’t even know I had on. I showed a fake smile to the world because that’s what I thought I must do if I wished to be accepted or liked. I was afraid to show my true colours; what was really present on the inside.

My invitation to my brothers of all ages is to be courageous and cry like a baby. Take off the mask you wear and show yourself to the world. Let yourself be vulnerable, share your true feelings authentically and openly.

If others put you down or shame you, then walk away because they are not your tribe. You will know your tribe when you find them because they will welcome you and accept you with open arms, they will hold you high when you are down and they will ask the same of you in return.

It is in breaking down that we build ourselves up to be stronger, more whole and more powerful.
@BradiDude (Click to Tweet!)

And isn’t it funny because the world is at a breaking point right now as everything falls apart.

There is no shame in being sad. There is no need to keep it in. We do not need a pill to stop the emotions. It is the most natural thing we can do. There is nothing wrong, even when we feel that we might drown in the waves of grief that are crashing down on us.

This is life. Lets celebrate the experience. Let the tears flow and please, if there is someone you care about deeply in your life, let them know. Show them.

Get off your computer and hug them because soon they may not be here and unfortunately, we’re not all so fortunate to know the number of days we have left with those special someone’s in our life like we did with Sasha the dog.

I felt so grateful knowing that we had seven whole days to be present with her before she would make her return to where we all must go someday. In that time I learned so much about being so fully present and cherishing every touch, smell and glance whenever I laid eyes on her. Not to mention how open Celeste’s and my hearts were to each other as we grieved and cried together many times a day.

Truly every moment we are breathing, conscious and alive is a precious gift not to be taken for granted. I’m grateful to know this and I’m grateful for all of the pain and all of the joy I’ve ever experienced. Life wouldn’t be the same without it!

Bradley T. Morris is a published author, world adventurer, an aspiring Professional Golfer, a loving husband and a life and business coach who supports people to activate the full potential of who they really are. He helps entrepreneurs create their visions, mothers to live more in balance, young adults to discover their passions, athletes to play their game in the zone and brilliant creative types to step into their power and share their gifts with the world. He has launched multiple eCourses that are positively impacting the lives of thousands of people in more than 20 countries around the world. You can find him on his website: www.BradleyTMorris.com and follow him on Twitter or FB.

Image courtesy of Anders Ljungberg.