I’ve been asking around: “What do you think you’re entitled to?” “What do you know that you deserve?”

Mikki Baloy Davis, a Facebook friend nailed it with this: “I’m always curious about this question…for me it brings up the distinction between “deserving” – which implies reward or merit – and “worthy” which is unconditional.” I got a witness.

Holy-loaded questions will get you some passionate answers: “I’m not entitled to a damn thing. But I deserve love.” “I don’t deserve anything, everything needs to be earned.” “I’m entitled to be on the planet, I work for the rest.” “I deserve right pay for right work…a foot rub and to be fanned and fed grapes…no less, no more than another…to be seen, heard, acknowledged…love, respect, fun, and money. Love…Love…Love…”

We’re such hard workers. Hardened, some of us, from working so hard to deserve what we want. Working to earn. Earning more…work. Earning your keep is a vicious cycle, you know.

Whereas, believing in your implicit worth liberates you to create more value for the world you serve. @DanielleLaPorte (Click to Tweet!)

Of course, people with entitlement issues are irritating. They want more than they’re willing to give upfront. They operate in a fog of hunger and conflicting intentions. Entitled types are frantic below the surface because they don’t trust that they can feed themselves. What they need is a long hug and then to be sent off for some solo time, without credit cards.

Deserving and worthiness…these are the notions that get to the pulse of our consciousness and esteem.

If you don’t believe you have the right to be here, there will never be enough space for your true self to show up.

If you think you need to earn your actual desires, you’re putting miles, years, between you and fulfillment. So many of us don’t even give ourselves permission to want what we want. This is the great tragedy of a malnourished spirit.

a declaration of deserving:

You are worthy of your desires. Really wanting what you want gives you the power to get it. You were born free. (The more you try to earn your freedom, the more trapped you become.) You are worthy of love and respect. Lovable.

You deserve

: eye contact
: smiles in the morning
: food made with pure intention
: clean drinking water, fresh air
: Hello, Please, Thank you.
: time to think about it
: a chance to show them what you’re made of
: a second chance
: an education
: health care, including dental
: multiple orgasms
: weekends and the summer off
: 8 hours of sleep
: play before work
: to change your mind
: to say no
: to say yes
: to have your deepest needs met
: to be seen
: to be loved for what is seen.

You deserve all this just because you showed up.
Yep, you’re that monumental.


Danielle LaPorte is the outspoken creator of The Desire Map, author of The Fire Starter Sessions (Random House/Crown), and co-creator of Your Big Beautiful Book Plan. An inspirational speaker, former think tank exec and business strategist, she writes weekly at DanielleLaPorte.com, where over a million visitors have gone for her straight-up advice — a site that’s been deemed “the best place on-line for kick-ass spirituality”, and was named one of the “Top 100 Websites for Women” by Forbes.

You can also find her on Facebook, Pinterest and Twitter @daniellelaporte.

*Featured image by Stavros Markopoulos